Barbara Eisele

Taming the Coulda’, Shoulda’, Woulda’ Dragon

Do you feel like you are on an emotional roller coaster this time of year?  On the one hand there is excitement, beautiful decorations, fun gatherings with friends.  On the other, there are the expectations, gatherings with family you rarely see outside the holidays, financial stress to buy gifts, too much food and drink, and not enough sleep. Put on top of that the inner conflict of wanting some time for yourself and the pressure to ‘get it all done’ on time.

I can so relate to the conflict inner and outer that happens this time of year.  This year I didn’t put up a Christmas tree because we are going to be at our cabin for the five days over Christmas.  The ‘shoulda’ demon was quick to show up.  Thank goodness I was ready for ‘her.’  (I have a friend who calls her the bitch in the attic.)  I invite you to follow the steps below to minimize the ‘shoulds’ this holiday and create some memories of inner peace, joy and self love.

  1. First breathe and ask yourself what kind of holiday do you want to have?
  2. What ‘shoulds’ are getting in the way of you having that?  Are you trying to do things perfectly, trying to do too many things?  Are you working to meet other people’s expectations?
  3. Which one can you let go of?  Just one right now.
  4. What will you do to nurture yourself instead of that should?  What friend will support you in this?
  5. Just do it!

If you are stuck as to what’s really important to you there is a FREE journal My Discovery of the Real Me on my website  I invite you to download it and start discovering your Authentic Self.

Shhh it’s not available until Friday but I’m giving you advanced notice that my second book release this year, Bold is Beautiful compiled by Kim Boudreau Smith will be available on Amazon at 10 AM Friday, Dec. 20.  It would make a great Christmas gift.

What I learned on my way to 111 Miles – Part 2

Wow, A 65 Mile Box; Darn!

It’s the first week of 2012, and before you know it we’ll be saying where did 2012 go? In that vein, have you set goals personal and professional goals for yourself for this year? Great if you have. If you haven’t maybe you’re saying, “I’d sure like to ____________, but it feels so big I don’t know how to do it, how will it ever happen”. Maybe you are saying, “this is the year to…” “I’m going to do it”, but in the background is “the voice” is saying, “ been here before and it didn’t happen, why bother”. All of this points to my topic for today. Whatever you have currently created is the “size of your box”.

When I was training for the 111 mile El Tour de Tucson last year I discovered that my cycling “box” was about 65 miles big. Wow, you say, that’s pretty big. Yes, it is, but it’s insufficient for a 111 mile ride. My desire to take on something so far out of my experience sent my body and mind into a tailspin. I had all the physical and emotional symptoms my body could throw at me. I was very anxious, my body was tired and I didn’t want to ride. Every time I thought of any distance beyond what I had ridden in the past the symptoms got louder. After deciding that I couldn’t force myself to overcome the anxiety and pain, I finally reached out for help. I had resisted help, saying I “should” be able to overcome this myself, after all I am a coach, I help people with similar issues. This was resistance talking and it was a powerful learning moment. By getting help, I was able to go beyond my previous limit.

Dr Joe Dispenza, gives the scientific evidence for what I have been saying for a long time. We can move only so far out of our ‘comfort zone’ before all kinds of resistance in the form of excuses, circumstances, or distractions, will show up. It’s the mind’s way of trying to keep you safe, one of its major functions. The good news is that the same mind that limits you can be changed to move you into a state that allows you to go beyond your current limits. Our brain, body and mind are wondrous, magnificent organisms, we just have to get them working for us.

In what way do you want to expand your box in 2012? If it’s a big stretch, don’t give in to the chatter in your mind that would limit you. Reach out and get help if you are stopped. I have two offers to support you reaching your goals in 2012 so a year from now you will have your arms raised in the air saying, “Yes, I did it”. First, you can go to my website and download my free e-workbook. It has step by step exercises for you. Second, Contact me for a free 30 minute lazer coaching session. Make 2012 your best year ever!

Barb Eisele - Life Transformations Coach

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